I think I’ve finally reached clarity regarding my inner struggle. What I’ve come to understand is that Satan is an asshole. Sure, I’ve always known he was the enemy, but through this experience I’ve come to have a new appreciation for what a jerk he is.
My friendship with Diane is one of the best things I have in my life right now. It’s not that my life otherwise sucks – it’s actually pretty good – but Diane adds a dimension of joy and meaning to my life that I didn’t previously have – and that’s a beautiful thing. It’s truly a blessing from God. And Satan, the asshole, has tried to ruin the whole thing and destroy everything that is good in my life in the process.
I wonder sometimes how I developed such a strong affection for Diane in such a short period of time, but mostly I’m just grateful for it. Although I make friends pretty easily and have many friends, it is actually quite rare that I really connect with someone on every level. I suppose that’s true for other people as well. Diane is one of those rare people for me where everything about her resonates with me and I know that is a big reason for the strength and depth of friendship I feel towards her. I’m not sure if she sees me as that same kind of person for her, but I hope that she does in some small measure (at least enough to want to keep me in her life as a friend forever 
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So, as I’ve worked through this inner struggle and prayed through it and blogged it out, here is the clarity that I have reached:
- My affection for Diane is strong and deep.
- My love for her is appropriate (agape).
- My intentions toward her are honorable.
- Satan, the asshole, has done his best to confuse me and to distort my feelings for Diane. He has done his best to get the current of love and affection that I feel for Diane to overflow the banks of agape and spill out into the flood plain of eros.
- I know that the lasting joy of an appropriate and honorable relationship with Diane will far exceed the temporary thrill of any misguided dalliance.
Tags: clarity, satan is an asshole
May 4, 2008 at 7:22 pm
[...] illumination and über blessings I said in a previous post that “I wonder sometimes how I developed such a strong affection for Diane in such a short [...]